Fire
Waikōloa Beach, Kona, Hawai’i
The black lava rocks & black sand beaches are perhaps the most alluring marks of beauty on the Big Island of Hawai’i, Kona. Their dark hues are mysterious & seductive. Their whispers softly graze the skin & arouse an intrigue for the secrets they hold.
They are the remnants of once flowing lava that has long since cooled. Molten streams of fire flowed from the volcanoes like flash rivers, bringing destruction to all in their path. She leaves behind a bleak & barren landscape that can be harrowing to behold, but her wreckage goes deeper than what meets the eye.
She brings a cleansing of land, spirit, & psyche.
She is a phenomenon perhaps too casually associated with catastrophe. Her explosiveness is misunderstood. While she can inflict disaster & death, her purpose is a regenerative one. Those who only see destruction, are blind to the brilliant red flowers that grow from the rich soil she gives.
Like Woman, man wants her to behave, to be tame & docile. They are loathe, perhaps even scared, to be caught in the carnage of her eruption. They don’t see how the fiery fury of both volcano & Woman is self-preserving and life-giving.
Anger marks the trespassing upon boundaries. If one goes too far into her sacred space, does she not have the duty to unleash outrage upon the offender? Whether it be her physical space or her right to live as she pleases, is she not entitled to defend herself against those who have wronged her? Banishing them from nearing her, forbidding entry where she does not want it? Is it not her responsibility to rid herself of invasive, noxious weeds?
Is it not a responsibility we all have to ourselves?
We all have a duty to respect and protect our inner peace & outer space. Relationships with others naturally come with an invasion of this space. In the event of a hostile takeover, we are called to harness our outrage, allowing a frenzy to overcome us so we have the power and force to fight against our assailant.
Yet, society has tripped the power circuit of anger. It can’t turn on, even when it’s most needed. This can be true for a complete stranger or an intimate confidante. Somehow we’ve learned that our rage is forbidden, taboo, an abomination. It is something too dangerous to feel. Like lava, its expression is too hot to hold between one’s hands & therefore impossible control. We are taught to keep dormant and still, with no chance of erupting. We do not know that such a mandate only makes for a more devastating and damaging explosion. One that is as unpredictable as it is merciless & violent.
They do not know that we should, that we must, use the first hint of anger to take action. To emit smoke to warn the trespasser to take not another step. To allow the initial rumblings to quake the earth a bit, advising our opponent to slowly retreat backward for they have come too far. The embers are stoked as we effortlessly cool them off, diffusing & dispelling the wrath as it serves its duty to protect.
Yet, we don’t know how to do that for we have long lost connection to our fire, to the initial rumblings of anger.
For the well-intended friend or lover, we mustn’t let our love for them blind us. If their questions or actions encroach upon us, we mustn’t silence the anger, but listen, use it to inform us so we can take careful steps forward so we can keep walking with them on the path of friendship. From us, then, comes not a homicidal explosion, but a warm flow of protective energy that pours out.
If our rage be of a violent, uncontrollable, annihilating one, it, too, must be honored. It does not mean we necessarily explode onto another person, although sometimes that is absolutely necessary. Sometimes, we need to honor and express our anger in private. If we don’t have a good relationship with anger, we don’t understand it and will thusly misuse it to our own destruction and detriment. Expressing anger from a place of misalignment can cause a loss of something or someone we really did want and need — a job, a lover, a friendship. When we feel and express our anger in the privacy of our own psyche and physical space, we can liberate it and ourselves. We are free to move, yell, scream, punch, kick, and say every vile word that lies within.
We needn’t fear that which pours forth for its truth is only as permanent as the emotion is and all emotions are temporary. We don’t need to judge words or phrases or desires that surface but, rather, recognize them as an infantile tantrum. It is a part of us, but it is not the whole story. We ARE kind beings. We are also feelers and with that comes the spectrum of emotions. To negate the so-deemed “unpleasant” ones only banishes them to the hidden parts of our psyche. Once there, they will not disappear like we hope. They will insidiously take over our behaviors and we won’t know who’s behind such actions because we have blinded ourselves to them.
Our body knows intuitively how to let the emotions run, or burn, through us, but too frequently we are taught to automatically deny their existence. They get trapped within us, desperately searching for a way out.
They are toxic within us, spoiling the pureness of our soul. This is why anger is cleansing. It can bring us back in touch with that which was left to spoil. Finally! We can locate that which needs to be cleared out and burn it.
It is in understanding that that activated rage is in part one with the present and in part a thing of the past, we can understand it better. If a person who offends us today triggers a response of epic proportions, it is likely that they are uncovering buried anger that was not unleashed upon the original assailant. This is where we need to be careful. Is our response directed at the right person? Or, is the current offender the scapegoat?
As a volcano does not erupt for the sake of man, she, too, is a spectacle that needs no audience. Rage may be inflicted by others, but her expression of it is for her alone. For those who do get burned by her wake, they often had time to get out of the way, had they heeded her warnings.
Like a volcano, she must cool. Such intensity is volatile &, if left unchecked, she will be consumed by it, creating an inferno that chars everything beyond repair.
How do you honor your own fire without getting burned?
Like fire to land, lava to earth, how do you use anger to purify your own space, to clear that which needed to die for new life to come?
